Oh, great. I'll be stuck on a train with commuters for hours and hours and hours. During rush hour. It would be faster to crawl there on my hands and knees. I really do think I should do something about this. Maybe I'll write to my MP tomorrow.

"Sleep what off? What's happening?" Nobody ever tells me anything around here. Maybe if I go to sleep I'll wake up somewhere normal instead of this crazy world full of stairs and taxis and people falling over.

Ooh, this futon's nice and soft. It feels a bit like sleeping on a giant marshmallow. It should also double as a handy midnight snack. I still can't remember if I had any dinner.