Christmas "Meme"

[snakewithbaggage]

Jingle Bells! Jingle Bells!
Suzu ga naru
Suzu no rizumu ni hikari no wa ga mau
Jingle Bells! Jingle Bells!
Suzu ga naru
Mori ni hayashi ni hibikinagara

Welcome to the Dinohouse Christmas "meme"! This is going to work a bit differently from most memes, but still free free to do what you want here!

The idea:
Following this post I will be making an assortment of Universe/Location "thread" comments. These will define the specific scene and universe being worked in. Comments by applicable characters will follow under that comment.

Example:
Mushverse; Shiba Mansion; open to Shinkengers

Comments following that would all be set in the Mushverse universe, be by any Shinkengers that want to participate, and take place at the Shiba Mansion Christmas party. Think of it sort of like every "top level" comment is its own post to the community.

Following that example, if your desired AU/Canon/etc isn't there, feel free to make a "thread" for it! Say there's already a Mushverse Go-busters "thread", and you want to do something in Aibouverse, or something more canon, maybe just between two characters? Make one!

Comments following the "thread" headings can be group setting free for all, or between individuals. Say it's a canon GokaiGalleon party, and Gai and Luka want to go off alone, or are on their way to the Galleon together? Their thread can be a separate second level comment thread beneath the main Canon Gokaiger thread.

I know that's a lot of information/qualifiers, but don't let it make you nervous to post, "rules" are fluid, and mainly set for added organization.

HAVE FUN. And enjoy the season!

Comments

[red_pleather]

That's something, I guess.

"Good. I take it your body is really the age you appear, then? Does it put particular strain on yours, or his, because he's physically a child and you're not?"

I'm speaking urgently, possibly too fast, but I want to know while he's here and - possibly - answering questions.

I'm also thinking furiously underneath, trying to figure out the best way to get him to tell Emi something that'll calm him down about me, but I don't really know... May as well just say it. "When you see him, tell him this doesn't change anything important, okay? Please. It makes things more complicated, but it doesn't change... the respect I have for him or, um, how I feel about him."

[goldenikemen]

"We haven't aged, not physically. I, uh." I sigh, I don't even know where to begin telling Hiromu the details, or if they're even mine to tell. I told Kurorin because of how close he and are were. Are.

"It's straining on both of us after a while, but... extra for him. It's why I was so... so upset with him. He should know better. Does know better."

I look at Hiromu, considering his request. Of course I'll tell him, but I'm not sure my Aibou will believe it coming from me right now. Then I get an idea.

"He should hear that from you." I grab Hiromu's wrist, and drag him off down the hall, J lumbering behind us.

I lead him to the room where Kuroki keeps his dimensional communications station. The one he used to first contact me before I and Emi came over in the avatar flesh. I boot up the machine - Kurorin might chew me out for this later, but it'll be worth it if it helps my Aibou - and make sure everything working properly before I call out to Emi, hoping he's paying attention.

"Aibou, please respond."

[silverpleather]

It's... weird being in the subdimension, alone.

Well, not alone. There's Masato's body, and my own. Locked away in... in caskets, unresponsive. Unreal, really. At least it feels that way. Not looking at Masato, I'm used to his face. I'm not even accustomed to my young face anymore, when I look at myself all I feel is shame and fear about what's going to happen, later.

"Je vous déteste." I mutter weakly at my own body, but it makes no difference. It's no different than talking into a mirror. Worse, since at least a mirror matches what I want to see. What I should see. What I believe myself to look like... Sure, the avatar was developed with Masato's help, aged every year to keep up with my mind.

But it's me damn it, the real me.

Unless it isn't.

Sometimes I think the best thing would be a glorious sacrifice, a game-changing moment where my life can buy the future of the entire world, and I don't have to try and face the reality of a future where I become one with this helpless child's body of mine.

"Je vous déteste!" I bring my hand, no longer flickering in this close proximity, down on the cover of the casket that protects it from the pressure of the subdimension.

"Aibou, please respond."

His voice echoes through the lab. Of course he's calling me aibou again, now that he feels bad. I scowl, wondering why he's bothering to contact me in this way. He said he was going to come down here.

I'm still mad at him. But I don't want to be alone.

I stomp over to the communications platform in the corner. He's taught me how to work it, and I put in the necessary commands to open real-time two way communications.

"Je suis ici. Is something wrong?"

[red_pleather]

It's stupid.

Jin-san yanks me into the room and starts up the communicator. I'm worried, focused, want nothing more than for Emi to be all right, especially now I have more information from Jin-san, and I know he's physically okay now, so it's stupid.

Really stupid.

But I break into a huge grin when I hear his voice anyway. "I'm here, too, Emi," I say quietly.

[goldenikemen]

"I'll be along shortly, Aibou." I tell Emi, then gesture for Hiromu to come to the center of the base.

"This is how you shut it down," I gesture at a couple of switches, easy enough to remember, even for a non-engineer. "Take your time."

I give Hiromu's back a pat, and then quietly excuse myself from the room, dragging J with me.

[silverpleather]

I go a little still when I hear Hiromu's voice. It echoes oddly, everything does in cross-dimension communication. But he doesn't sound... upset. Or angry. Or hurt. Or anything but soft.

He's probably scared.

For me.

Stupid, adorable wonderful brat.

I care for him so much more than I do for myself.

"Salut." I respond softly. "Alright, aibou."

I hear him instruct Hiromu on how to deal with the machine, and I realize that he is going to leave us alone to talk for a moment.

I sigh softly, away from the receiver so Hiromu doesn't hear.

"So." I start, and then hesitate, because I'm not sure what to say. I want to make this right between us, somehow, but I don't know how. Or if it's even possible.

"So you know now."

[red_pleather]

It's oddly intimate.

I can't see him. I'm alone here. But the sound of his voice, even though it echoes strangely...

Oddly intimate.

"I do," I say calmly enough. "And it doesn't change anything important, Emi. Were you... were you worried I'd hate you?"

[silverpleather]

For all the things I was worried about-

he'll never look at me the same way, he'll start to think of me as a child, he might not want to touch me, what happens in the future, what happens right now

-none of those were anywhere near the word he uses just then, and I shake my head even though he can't see it.

"Non, non." I assure him softly, sure that the technology will carry my voice clearly to him anyway. "Not that, never that..."

I pause and try to put my thoughts into a more cohesive order.

"I was frightened that you might be... upset. That you didn't know. That I never told you... couldn't tell you."

I swallow, hard, though it doesn't do anything for me, really. It still seems right.

"I was worried about what you would think. How you might view me differently, knowing..."

Another pause, another little sigh, this one where he can here. "I was worried about what this could mean for the future."

[red_pleather]

I think about that for a little while, and nod slowly. "I do wish you'd told me earlier. But I can see how there would never be a good time for it."

...then I'm completely derailed, and he can probably hear the grin in my voice. "You think about us having a future together?"

[silverpleather]

"It's not-" I trail off, because I don't really have an answer to that. Of course there's no good time. There's no good anything about this. It's terrible.

I bet he's smiling as he says that next part, and I sigh again, weary at the rush of thoughts this brings on.

"I have." I admit. "I have thought about how much I would enjoy it. And I have thought..." My voice breaks and I wince. "I have thought of how difficult it would be. For you. For us. How I... I don't know. I don't know anything, 'iromu, about the future. What if..."

The thought had only occurred to me a few times before, I always quash it before it can get out of hand and destroy me.

"What if this state of stasis is permanent?"

[red_pleather]

"Ah, that was probably going to be my next question," I say softly, calmly. "Emi? I don't know what you've been going through with all this. But I know I... I care about you, and I know you're you. No matter what your body looks like. We can work out the details. What matters is that you're you."

[silverpleather]

He is so blunt and earnest and I know he means every word, and it makes my heart ache.

How I desire to hold him in my arms and actually feel it.

How long will it be before this can ever be even a slight hope of reality?

How could it ever, ever be truly all I imagine it to be, all I want from it?

In that dark foreseeable future, even if it happens within the year, will turn our altogether average four-year age difference with myself as the elder... Dark. Wrong. Inappropriate. Nine years age difference across the lines of adulthood.

"It's a child, 'iromu." I whisper weakly. "Pathetic and weak and possibly permanent. What then?"

[loveenetronkurorin]

There are conversations I really don't want to overhear.

I turn off the terminal and step out of the alcove, sighing, and raise my eyebrows at Jin. "I didn't want to hear that. Did what I think happen just happen?"

[goldenikemen]

The moment I'm in the hallway I feel like crumbling to my knees, like that would do any good at all. I don't, but I do sway a little, and bring a hand up to cover my eyes for a moment.

I hope things go well in there. As well as they can go, anyway. It won't excuse me giving away Emi's secret like that though, even if it was an accident.

Part of me is startled to see Kurorin, part of me glad, and another part a little worried that he's going to tell me off like I should be told off.

It's not often I feel guilt. But right now is one of those rare times.

I simply nod, I don't need to ask for confirmation of what he's asking.

[loveenetronkurorin]

My idiot covers his eyes and looks unutterably weary for a moment. I know things are bad when his avatar looks that crap.

I'm still wearing the goddamn Santa hat.

I tuck an arm around him, steering him towards one of the conference rooms. "Come on. Sit with me for a while."

[goldenikemen]

I lean into him as he guides me, as if I can actually gain strength and support from his steadying arm. Psychologically I can, a little, but the reminder that I can't really feel him sort of counteracts that.

"I fucked up really bad tonight, Kurorin." I say as I let him move me to a seat.

I lean forward, my hair covering much of my face, and gaze down at my hands, remembering how badly Emi's were flickering.

"He scared the shit out of me, and I won't be sorry for yelling at him, but for Hiromu to overhear about Emi's body..."

[loveenetronkurorin]

I keep a hand on his back as he sits. I know he can't feel it, not really, but I need to anchor him. Maybe as much for my sake as for his.

"It had to come out at some point," I rumble at him, calmly enough. I'm rubbing his back now. "It's probably better now, when they can talk about it. Hiromu didn't run screaming, and once Emeric realises he has Hiromu's support, that should make things a little easier for him."

I sigh. "However. I should ask first. Is Emeric actually all right? Physically, I mean?"

[goldenikemen]

God but I wish I could feel his hand on my back just now. Someday, if I get my body back, I'm going to make him give me a three hour long back rub.

"I know," I sigh, still watching my hand as I slowly flex my fingers. "But it shouldn't have come out like that. And tonight of all nights. He was having such a good time."

I give a small nod. "He'll be okay now that his avatar isn't so far away from his body." I curse softly, my hand now a fist. "He should have been more careful..."

[loveenetronkurorin]

He keeps looking at his hand. I frown a little, following his gaze.

"Maybe because he wants to be 'like everyone else'," I speculate quietly. "Or at least, like you. As strong as you. An adult, physically. Now that Hiromu knows, too, Emeric won't have to feel like he can hide behind pretending to be like you. Maybe that'll help, a little."

Poor kid.

[goldenikemen]

Somewhat reluctantly, I part with Kurorin. I both don't want to leave him, and am nervous about seeing Emi face to face again.

But I know I need to face this, and the sooner the better. I hate to think of bad blood between me and my Aibou.

I shift back into the Subdimension, shaking my hair out once I'm there and resting my hands on my hips. I wander off into the lab after.

"Aibou? ...Emi?"

[silverpleather]

I had to practically shoo Hiromu off the communications device, telling him to go enjoy the Christmas with Ryuuji and Youko and Nick and everyone. A Christmas he should have had a long time ago, with or without me. Not that I doubt his sister has done much to make the season good for him, but still.

Still, that leaves me alone in the subdimension. And I'm still not used to it, I'm really not. Even before we gathered the requisite amount of Enetron to hack Jueki and Kotako onto a transporting Megazord, and then to project our avatars... Well, I guess I'm just not used to being completely alone in general. After thirteen years. For a while, it was just Masato and me, but Masato was always there. And then, once Jueki and Kotako were activated, I always had them...

I'm standing between Masato's body and my own when his avatar codes back into the subdimension, and I hear him calling for me from the main lab.

"I'm in here." I call softly from the side-room where our bodies are...

Stored.

[goldenikemen]

Somehow I knew. He would be... there.

I peak inside the room where our bodies are kept, reaching up to hold onto the top of the door frame as I slouch a bit, trying to look casual, even though I'm aching.

He's standing between our bodies, exactly where he used to lie down when he was small, when he still thought that he, his avatar, needed to sleep. He would crawl in and curl up, facing his body's own containment area.

If he'd been younger, I would have worried that he thought his stasis body was actually his twin. But Emi was always so smart.

"I'm sorry." I say, sincerely.

[silverpleather]

I've got one hand on the... box that holds my own body when he comes into the doorway and slouches there. Forced nonchalance. I know him too well for him to get away with that scot-free. But I'll let him try, at least.

"It was an accident." I say coolly. My voice is strained. Even after the talk with Hiromu, his reassurance, I'm still...

Shaken. Startled. Uncomfortable at the idea of him knowing.

It's easy to say all the right things, the promise to care for me and be by my side forever. He hasn't seen the body yet.

I look down at it just then, and sigh a little.

"Remember when I used to try to sleep?" I say weakly.

[goldenikemen]

I hover for a moment, then gradually let go of the door frame, step away from the door and more into the room, hands at my hips.

"I do." I brush my fingertips along my containment compartment as I move closer to Emi, just giving my own body a passing glance before I look back to Emi.

And glance at his body.

Sigh.

I lean back against my... box, arms crossed over my chest, and sigh.

"I do."

[silverpleather]

He moves closer. He pays his body scarcely a passing glance. As usual. He's never had much use for it. He doesn't fixate, like I do.

Things haven't changed, for him.

It's not the same.

I look up at him when he leans back against the box holding his body. For all that I'm used to him, used to his face, that is a little unnerving. Like there's two of him... I look back down at my own youthful face.

"I used to think it was Etienne, you know. Or, non. I never really thought that. But I used to pretend."